If They Ever Learn These Things
by OtakuLibra
Summary: This is why they are who they are. Originally written for the Awesome Ladies Ficathon on LJ.


She's a civilian, been retired for five years now. Technically, she's a liability. But Winona Kirk is a liability by nature, and it isn't like Starfleet will tell her _no_.

She shows up on the bridge, beaming.

"Jimmy," she says, slinging an arm around his shoulders, "This. Is a beautiful ship."

And the thing is, Winona's an engineer to the core, so Jim knows _exactly_ what she means. "Don't you dare let her touch the engines, Scotty." Winona gives him a hurt look. "That's an order."

"I did _not_ raise such a killjoy."

"Nah. You just taught me to be a hardass is all."

She punches him in the arm. "Well goddammit, you're a little shit, but you're right."

She drops unceremoniously into the command chair, like she _belongs_ there. Jim should probably say something about that. Except, this is Winona Kirk, and she may be his mother, but on a starship? She's fucking _terrifying_.

This is why Starfleet can't tell her no. Jim doesn't blame them.

It's a milk run, anyway, and it isn't like there's anything important for them to be doing, so. Winona just sits in the chair and snarks at everyone while giving Jim and Spock smirking looks. And Jim thinks that if this wasn't his mother, it would be hilarious.

* * *

"Jim Kirk," she says, when Nyota first introduces them. "As in, your mother is Winona Kirk?"

He seems sort of surprised. "Uh, yeah."

"Holy shit." In that moment, Gaila decides they're going to be friends. Because Winona Kirk? Is Gaila's engineering _idol_. The woman is a _genius_ with starships, and Gaila's spent years trying to be just as good.

Later, when they know each other better, Gaila will realize that Jim's spent his entire life defined by his father. He doesn't have people recognize his mother in him. It's kind of sad, in a weird way.

He's… decent with machines, but… Kind of in the abstract. He can hack and program like nobody's business, and he's decent in a pinch, like when they're all piled in McCoy's flitter and it breaks down on the way in from the city. But. The point is, he'd never make it in engineering. And he's actually rather brilliant in command. So… it kind of almost makes sense, the way everyone talks about Jim like he's the second coming of George.

Except, Gaila's seen old holovids of Winona, and that swagger of Jim's? All her.

* * *

Winona does get down to Engineering eventually. (Please, she's been a Starfleet officer longer than Jimmy's been _alive_; she knows what the hell she's doing.) It's fucking _beautiful_. She's been on Constellation class starships before, of course, but never the _Enterprise_. Starfleet's outdone itself with this one.

Scotty shows her around like a proud father showing off his kids. Winona likes him, likes the way she can laugh and call him crazy and he won't just give her weird looks and call her a hypocrite. (Even though she so is.)

She's halfway inside a generator when she hears an earnest, timid voice say, "Commander Kirk?"

Winona almost bangs her head on the wiring panel. "Yeah?" she grunts, sliding out on her back.

There's this Orion girl standing there, bright red hair and an even brighter smile. "Nice to meet you, Commander."

Winona gives her a crooked grin. "You a good engineer?" she asks.

The girl pauses, then nods. "I've read all your papers."

"All right. Get down here, kid."

* * *

"Okay, come on, you've never read her paper on time travel and spatial distortions at warp speed?"

Jim's eyes are pretty much glazed over by this point. Gaila raises an eyebrow at him. "Seriously?"

He shrugs. "I wasn't ever much of an engineer," he offers. Gaila waves him off.

"Whatever. I don't care. It's freaking beautiful, Jim. Changed my life."

Jim gives her a weird look. "An engineering paper. God, you nerd."

Gaila throws a pillow at him. "Yeah, Mr. I-Aced-Number-One's-Last-Test. Don't even."

"Well sure," he quips, "but it didn't give my life _meaning_."

From there, the conversation devolves into a wrestling match until Nyota comes back from her evening class and makes an entirely wrong assumption about what's been going on.

* * *

Winona thinks she may have run away a little.

Her father had been a mechanic. Not innately skilled with machines the way Winona always was, but he _knew_ everything.

Her mother designed starships, so they lived in Arizona to be near her lab. Winona used to go climbing, the rust-colored stone that she heard looked like Vulcan. She used to imagine herself on starships like the ones Mom designed, fixing things.

The point is, Winona was _made _for this. There is a part of her that still believes that.

But there was George, and—it wasn't okay; it's never been okay. It's just that it became something she had to deal with, the way she'd worked around baby bumps and broken arms. But there was George, and then there was Jim, and somewhere along the line Winona forgot about the girl who used to go climbing in Arizona and work in her dad's shop.

Being back kind of feels like home.

* * *

Gaila was raised a slave. She tries not to make that an excuse anymore; she hates the pitying looks she gets when she talks about it.

But the one time she really needed to, Gaila didn't know what to do.

She knows what dilithium and flesh smell like when they burn.

* * *

She thinks maybe she should ask, maybe… Jim has always been her son. If George were alive, she thinks he would say the same thing. They're so alike, but… There are things she just doesn't know how to talk to him about.

But she's with this girl, covered in sweat and the smell of engines and her leather jacket pressed alongside the girl's engineering reds, and…

Aw, what the hell.

"What made you decide to be an engineer?" she asks.

* * *

Gaila's hands freeze. It's partially because _Winona Kirk_ is talking to her and partially because… Well.

"The ship that was smuggling us into Federation space was attacked. I was the oldest Sister, and so much of the crew was dead, and… I was responsible for those girls, and I couldn't do anything for them. Five of us survived."

Winona doesn't say anything, and Gaila's fingers rewire on autopilot, her heart racing.

"I didn't want to be that powerless."

Out of the corner of her eye, Gaila sees Winona nod.

"You're all right, kid," she says, quiet.

* * *

It's another three days before Winona sees the girl again.

Winona leans against a bulkhead in the transporter room, grinning at the Orion girl working the console.

"Well," she says, "This is my stop."

The girl raises an eyebrow. "Jim—The captain isn't here?"

Winona shakes her head. "The kid's never been good with goodbyes. I told him I could see myself out."

"Oh. Well… My name's Gaila, by the way."

Winona gives her a crooked grin, holds out her hand. Gaila shakes it. Hesitant, but her grip is strong. Winona thinks she's definitely right about this one.

She jumps the last two steps to the transporter pad and gives Gaila a sharp salute. "Nice working with you, Gaila. Look me up next time the _Enterprise _is in spacedock. Oh, and make sure Jimmy at least makes you XO of engineering, for god's sake. The lack of women in senior officer positions is laughable."

Gaila smiles. "Will do, Commander."

"All right then. Energize."


End file.
